October 25, 2016

I feel like molasses. I’m moving so slowly, but thank God I’m inching along. It is hard to believe that Luz is now less than 6 weeks away. I want so much to make it perfect, to have all the right moves, the right costumes, the right lighting, and of course the energy to do it all. I want so much to have more time, enough time. But those desires of perfection are mostly ego talking. What I could be wanting instead is to be in each moment of making Luz. What I could be focused on is the perfection of this opportunity, like a divine appointment. That is so much more precious than ego. 
I’ll be working on that. 
Gladly, I have some inspiration. There are women all around me--probably heaven sent--who are mothers in the arts. Usually, I only get to witness the product of their art rather than the process of their art, but I can imagine all the thought, planning, and work they do behind the scenes, and the beauty of their practice. They weave everyday with art. 
They take a photo and fill a bottle. They make a brush stroke and comfort a crying child. They sew a stitch and run a bath. They write a verse and put their children to bed with a story. They dream an art project and wake to a child’s head on their shoulders. 
I'm so grateful to them. I honor their everyday. Their everyday work pushes me to get up early, before the rest of the house is awake, grab my flamenco shoes, and drive to a studio where I will fight to move better, feel more, dance well. I might be molasses, but I’ll get there eventually. I hope someday soon, molasses will be the very thing I treasure.

Sunrise in the studio.